You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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