What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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