yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
