Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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