I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
just tell him i said nine months
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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