We won't sleep together?
"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
