I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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