What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
