"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
