haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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