last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
