Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize
