We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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