none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
