it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I think I am morally bankrupt
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Randomize
