how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Randomize