This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
