Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
