Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Randomize
