God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
