she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
