your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
When did angry sex become our thing?
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
