i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
