4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize