Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

why didn't you poke me back

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(407): View more from Florida

When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.

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(763): View more from Minnesota

He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.

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(859): View more from Kentucky

i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex

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(218): View more from Minnesota

You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.

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(336): View more from North Carolina

Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?

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(407): View more from Florida

she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"

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(865): View more from Tennessee

Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.

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