I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
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