this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize