my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
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