She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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