he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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