ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
