i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
