I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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