1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
