My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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