your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
you win again, gameday.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
