google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
