I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Randomize
