I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
