Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
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