So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
