Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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