My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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