i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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