Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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