ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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