bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
you told grandpa to call you daddy
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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