Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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