i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
pray to the hookup gods
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize