so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Randomize
