every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
