dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
COCAINE IS GR8
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
